A FRESH START // a resurrection of sorts

  I started this blog in 2009, fresh out of Rocky Mountain School of Photography.  I remember the first day of class (oddly enough, exactly 4 years ago), meeting and greeting with other wide-eyed and curious souls, coming together from a range of backgrounds, sitting in a giant circle introducing ourselves.  I knew the basics, my name, where I was coming from, 3 things I love to do, but when asked what my favorite kind of photography was, I was stumped.  I had no clue.  I was nervous to begin with, but that put me over the edge.  There I was, sitting at photography school and I didn't even know what kind of photography I liked.  Ha!  I also have a memory from the very beginning of school, when one of our teachers had assigned us all to tear out images of magazines or books (pre pinterest!) that we admired.  I still have that folder, and I am still inspired by the images I collected with my gut and 'untrained' eye.  I was less than thrilled however, when we went around the room and dissected our selections for one another, to see what we 'liked', and maybe offering some suggestions of a potential starting point for what we might be interested in shooting ourselves.  My photos ranged from intense action shots to beautifully designed and shot interiors and exteriors, to food, to aerials of icebergs, to a Richard Avedon image from Vanity Fair.  I had creative product shots, a New Belgium Brewery cut-out styled graphic design element and lots of images of beautiful faces and faraway places.  I was still conflicted about what kind of photography I liked, what photography I thought I should like, where I fit in and how photography fit in with me.  Some of the best advice doled out that summer, was from our instructor Eileen.  "Be authentic." Over and over, so simple but more difficult to adhere to at times in today's day and age than one might think.  Fast forward to our graduation day, where our classmate, Jimmy White, was eloquently reflecting upon our time spent at RMSP and the future that lay ahead.  Cautioning us wisely, his remark that struck me was "remember why you came here."

 It is no surprise to me that my first attempt at blogging failed.  In fact, it's been over two years since I've even looked at this platform.  I am a bit of a perfectionist and at the time, I didn't know what I wanted.  I'm naturally more of an observer and not so much of an extrovert and blogging felt very foreign to me.  I thought I had to present everything in just the right way, a way that felt very contrived.  Maybe it's age, maybe it's confidence, maybe it's just a matter of getting to the point where none of it really matters to me anymore, maybe it's me being ok with being me, me ok with being put in a 'box'.  I have always lived my life on my terms, my adventures in photography are no different.  What is important to me now is that I am growing, that I am ready for this step.  I welcome it even!  I have spent the last three years dabbling, in life and in photography, just trying to figure it out, sometimes with success, and other times, not as much.  I do know one thing, and that is that I initially pursued photography because of my love to travel.  I have always been a wanderlusting, independent individual and when it dawned on me that I could take a camera anywhere, I was sold.  But it has taken me this long to finally be ready.  Thankfully, I love to be creative, and have come to terms with the fact that for me, photography is just as much about the process as it is the final product.  So, here I am, four years later, ready to bring it full circle, to show the world what I've been up to, what I strive for, what I am truly passionate about.  I know I still have (thankfully! ) much to learn, and part of that will be through this platform and sharing with others.  There's only one way to grow and it's to put myself out there, in the raw.  So, here's to more photography, more art, more community, more reaching out, more travel, more risk, more challenge, more development.  Cheers to being real.  
hawaii, 2011
Looking forward to hanging this image and others in an upcoming show at Honey's Cafe, here in Red Lodge.  Photos to come ;) I promise.

1 comment:

HAILEY said...

I really needed to hear this Bear. Thank you. Can't wait for more posts!